I know... the image is shocking. I want to preface my comments in this blog entry with this: I have never suffered from an eating disorder and so I am being super aware of the sensitivity of this picture. And please know this.. I am not looking to take these situations lightly. And no.. this blog is NOT about eating disorders.
What is it about? It's about the Principle of Self-Discovery.
Looking at this photo one can see that the image in the mirror is depicting a very different image of who this girl actually is. So, which is more important? The obviously frail and possibly (if not most definitely) sick young woman who is standing in her bedroom? Or the image of who this girl THINKS she is?
In the context of this blog, the answer is very much indeed the image of who she thinks she is. Without getting into the psychology of what goes on in the minds of these young women (because remember, this blog is NOT about eating disorders) I want you, the reader, to think about what this means for you.
You see, it is not who you are that matters as much as who you THINK you are. And it matters a lot! It is who you think you are that decides on which car you drive, which man you decide to marry, who your friends are, where you live and so on and so on. It decides how much money you have in your bank account and why you do what you do for a job. Or if you don't have a job.
So, what's the relevance of all this? It's not so much that how we think of ourselves makes our decisions. It's more than that.
You see, some statistics show that approx 95% of who or what we think of ourselves goes on at a subconscious level where we are pretty much on autopilot making decisions for ourselves. (Even the major ones - like choosing our husbands or wives!) And where do we get the way we think about ourselves in the first place? Well.. that's the most shocking part... almost ALL of our beliefs about ourselves and others are developed in our minds by the time we are 18. We learned them from whoever had the most impact on us when we were growing up. So, for most of us.. it's our parents. (Ever notice that you are becoming more and more like your mother the older you get?!)
I know... most of you probably already know this. But, do you know it like a man knows about child birth? Or do you know child birth like a woman does who has delivered a real life size child?
How do we know what our beliefs are then if they are 95% of the time at an unconscious level? Excellent question! Our thoughts become feelings which become our actions (or behaviour). In knowing this little fact, the best way to start to uncover some of those beliefs is to listen to the self-talk that goes on inside your noggin, be aware of how you are feeling and watch the way you behave. THAT is how you will soon be aware that to own a $250, 000 car (for example) will either be a part of your "Yes- I would like that." or "What? Are you flippin kidding me? How am I ever going to own a car for that much?" kind of thinking. Make sense?
Here's a great way to practice noticing what you think.
Fill in these blanks:
1. Fat people are_______________________
2. Skinny people are ____________________
3. Rich people are _____________________
4. Men are ____________________________
5. Women are _________________________
6. Poor people are _____________________
However you responded to these is exactly how you think about these examples. And everyone's responses will be different. Why? Because everyone has a different belief about all of these examples.
Discovering who we think we are is important because until we discover what it is we truly believe about ourselves, we can truly start to change our circumstances. Until then... quit wishing you were richer, happier, smarter, funnier etc.
Until next time... start discovering who you think you are! (And for real. Not who you wish you are!).
In love and success,
Supporting women in living a life of significance.
"I am committed to inspiring, empowering and educating women on being architects of change in the world, using enterprise as a vehicle - all according to their Purpose, Passion and Strengths."
"Find out what you love to do, discover what it is you do best & be an agent of change in the world. Now that's a life worth living!" Melissa Haupt.
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